Where Do We Go From Here? 
Mindfulness Practices for Parenting Adolescents and Teens  

Parenting can take various forms of kinship, including resource parents who care for adopted or fostered children, fictive kin who are oftentimes extended family members caring for children, or biological parents who extend support to their developing child. Adolescence, in particular, is a critical stage of development that involves unique challenges for parents (Eriksons, 1987). Challenges during this stage of development may include changes in teens’ personal values that deviate from caregivers’ beliefs and difficulties with self-acceptance stemming from societal messaging (e.g., online bullying & social media marketing).  

Parenting an adolescent/teen is difficult for many reasons.

Parenting can become increasingly difficult when adolescents are not responsive to their caregiver’s parenting approach, which may be influenced by family history and intergenerational attachment patterns (Parmanandani, 2024). Although research suggests that authoritative parenting can create a warm yet disciplined social environment for adolescents, relational conflicts between caregivers and adolescents are bound to occur.

When a “stuck point” or point of contention occurs, mindfulness can serve as a coping mechanism for caregivers. Mindfulness practices originate from Buddhist philosophies and have been integrated into evidence-based therapies, including Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Dialectical Behavior Therapy. Mindfulness entails present-moment awareness and has been evidenced to support emotion regulation, which can be modeled in dysregulated adolescents while parenting. Here are tips to help you practice mindfulness when parenting dysregulated teens:

Take a Moment to Pause:  

• Taking three deep breaths stimulates the vagus nerve, which is associated with the parasympathetic nervous system and is involved in physiological rest.
• Deep breathing allows room to proactively respond to teens when challenges arise.

Naming Feeling  

• Labeling emotions increases self-awareness of activating events that elicit strong emotions while parenting.
• Understanding your emotions can help you provide a conscientious response to your teen.  

Be Curious  

• Asking questions that link an adolescent’s internal response to external events can aid emotion regulation.
• Explore statements like, “When I called your name, you yelled at me. I imagine you’re feeling frustrated. What are you angry about in this moment?”
• This can support adolescents in processing their emotions directly, encouraging communication with their caregiver when emotionally distressed.  

Validate

• Validating your teens' experience of stressors can promote understanding and encourage safety in the caregiving relationship.

Self-care  

• Engaging in a consistent and accessible self-care routine (i.e. taking walks), can help caregivers regulate their own emotional responses prior to interacting with their teen, leading to increased prosocial interactions.